i've been watching your world from afar
i've been trying to be where you are
and i've been secretly falling apart
The dad has been given two invitation cards to Zouk for FiRST mag's 2nd birthday party, but SO UNFORTUNATELY it's for 18 years and above. Dad gave them to yours truly anyhow, because he knew that I couldn't go -____- And I am, well, not very happy about that. That's why Danielle Koh and Low Ching Chieh are proud to present all those midgets out there who are under 18 with 101 Ways To Sneak Into A Club. Except that 101 ways will take an estimated twenty days so we have 15 for you today. I have to mention that on the invitation, it states "Come dressed as your favourite movie character and be spotted by our judges to win 'star' prizes!" So pardon us if it involves corny getups and outfits. Read at your own risk.
15 Ways to Sneak Into A Club
1. Dress as a geisha and utter complete gibberish till the bouncer relents. Please remember your pocket fan.
2. Arrive on stilts for the unfortunately petite with the essential long black skirt. Don't blame us if you get concussion.
3. Fake IDs. The fundamental.
4. Rouge. Not too much, but just enough. Same goes for lipstick. However, for eyeliner, the more the merrier. Somehow adults enjoy looking like drunk pandas.
5. Dress up as a ghost from a horror movie of your choice. Hopefully the bouncer's terrified of spirits.
6. If you're rich, what else can you do BUT bribe the guy.
7. Disguise as Yoda. Perfect for the short 'uns.
8. Wear a bright purple pendant and hypnotise the bouncer. Let... me... in...
9. If you're a bad singer, sing. Don't stop till they let you in.
10. Bring a copy of the 21st Century Oxford Dictionary (or anything heavy.) and whack the guy till he loses his marbles. Then run in.
11. Tickle him.
12. Go gothic. When you're gothic, no one can tell how the hell old you are.
13. Dress as a doctor complete with stethoscope and clipboard and diagnose the bouncer with AIDS. Have him shipped off to the hospital, then congratulate yourself on your flawless acting.
14. Tell him that there's a phonecall for him from his mother in the club. He'd ask you to lead him to the phone.
15. Promise the bouncer you'll get him an autograph of whatever female star he drools over in the club.
A weak attempt of dry humour.
I have to mention how spastic my father is. When I woke up this morning I saw on my computer table a 10-dollar note, and below was a newspaper article. Upon scrutinising it was a cutout of Today - the article about huangna? And this tiny paragraph was circled.
"The saying, 'do not judge a book by its cover' must be explained to our children."
I guess daddy meant it quite literally since I refused to buy the brown-covered version of angels and demons. Hello I LIKE THE BLUE COVERED ONE, is that a crime? And what's wrong with waiting till the blue-covered version arrives? But since he gave me an extra 10 bucks means I can go down to orchard to get it anytime :)
15 Ways to Sneak Into A Club
1. Dress as a geisha and utter complete gibberish till the bouncer relents. Please remember your pocket fan.
2. Arrive on stilts for the unfortunately petite with the essential long black skirt. Don't blame us if you get concussion.
3. Fake IDs. The fundamental.
4. Rouge. Not too much, but just enough. Same goes for lipstick. However, for eyeliner, the more the merrier. Somehow adults enjoy looking like drunk pandas.
5. Dress up as a ghost from a horror movie of your choice. Hopefully the bouncer's terrified of spirits.
6. If you're rich, what else can you do BUT bribe the guy.
7. Disguise as Yoda. Perfect for the short 'uns.
8. Wear a bright purple pendant and hypnotise the bouncer. Let... me... in...
9. If you're a bad singer, sing. Don't stop till they let you in.
10. Bring a copy of the 21st Century Oxford Dictionary (or anything heavy.) and whack the guy till he loses his marbles. Then run in.
11. Tickle him.
12. Go gothic. When you're gothic, no one can tell how the hell old you are.
13. Dress as a doctor complete with stethoscope and clipboard and diagnose the bouncer with AIDS. Have him shipped off to the hospital, then congratulate yourself on your flawless acting.
14. Tell him that there's a phonecall for him from his mother in the club. He'd ask you to lead him to the phone.
15. Promise the bouncer you'll get him an autograph of whatever female star he drools over in the club.
A weak attempt of dry humour.
I have to mention how spastic my father is. When I woke up this morning I saw on my computer table a 10-dollar note, and below was a newspaper article. Upon scrutinising it was a cutout of Today - the article about huangna? And this tiny paragraph was circled.
"The saying, 'do not judge a book by its cover' must be explained to our children."
I guess daddy meant it quite literally since I refused to buy the brown-covered version of angels and demons. Hello I LIKE THE BLUE COVERED ONE, is that a crime? And what's wrong with waiting till the blue-covered version arrives? But since he gave me an extra 10 bucks means I can go down to orchard to get it anytime :)
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