not another

i keep your words
every trace
i store them somewhere safe
but they lie forgotten
or at least,
i try to leave them alone.
somehow i know
only the toughest can brace
themselves to hold on, but let go anyway.

you left without a word
without a second glance
without another chance
how was i supposed to know?
if only you knew
if only i could say
how i die everyday
knowing things will never go back to the way
they used to be.

i wonder if you'll feel bad
if you knew i was down
but you weren't there
to teach me how to live again.

I'm so sick of this, so sick of telling myself the same thing everyday and pulling myself together, only to return to the same fucking useless state I was in previously. EIGHT more days, and everything will all be over.